I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
