I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Randomize
