I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
