I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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