i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize