Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
