didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
The adults are the big ones right?
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