Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize