i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
