We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
