Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Watching her eat just hurts me
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
