do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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