There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
