If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize