yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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