Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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