Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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