You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
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