Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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