After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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