it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
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