Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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