Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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