the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Randomize
