You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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