yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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