it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
There's always time for handjobs
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
