is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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