I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
