Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
