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• (352): View more from Florida

  She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus

  Fav 26 1123 3865

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.

  Fav 55 3979 977

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat

  Fav 20 3147 1237

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  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic

  (1-402): View more from Nebraska

  i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.

  Fav 10 6066 1389

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance

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  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.

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• (549): View more from

  Just put me in your contacts as coyote

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• (760): View more from California

  We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.

  Fav 2 300 143

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• (850): View more from Florida

  We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.

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