She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.