My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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