She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
