that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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