These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
