how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
