i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize