dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
