i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
