Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
You are a genius and a whore.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
