im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
