My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
sarcasm needs its own font
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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