he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
