I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
