I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
