We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
