so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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