i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Pants are for mortals
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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