Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
