Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
