TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
