just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
